27 August 2011

Disney Romance... Oh How I LOVE It!


So for years I've been reading about how Disney has ruined women's expectations of men, and yet so many women fight this yearning that their lives were meant to be something more.

Like Belle, Ariel, Pocahontas, Kidagakash, Jasmine, etc... we want more. We want more, not because we're women and unreasonable, but because life is glorious and meant to be lived.

Sometimes, I want to give in to it... that voice that says my expectations are too high, I'm just being unreasonable, I should just settle, or even as Becca put it in her article "Disney is Ruining My Life," "I'm not settling for, but rather, I'm settling in."

What disturbs me most about this concept is that it presumes that adjusting to "adult life" means letting go of the "fantasies of youth." "Adult life" just feels like this, and it's ok... NO!!!

There are certain things about adult life that I could do without: the fact that humidity ruins my hair now matters, being the bigger person in relationships counts more, and now I usually do know better.

But being mature doesn't have to mean settling for the status quo or just convincing myself that "adult life" just feels like this. Adults don't have to lose their child-like nature, their wanderlust, their innocence or love of fun.

Secondly, the concept of "just being rescued" in Disney movies is not necessarily the case. In Snow White and Sleeping Beauty, yes... Snow White and Aurora are asleep, ergo, someone needs to rescue them. But they are kind and good and reckless a bit, and worth rescuing... are you?

In later Disney movies, the female characters usually suffer some sort of domestic trouble, from Belle looking after her mad-inventor Father and being pressured to marry Gaston, Cinderella is enslaved by her Stepmother, and Rapunzel being kidnapped and psychologically manipulated her entire life. And Disney "Princes" aren't usually all-dat-and-a-bag-of-chips either... Aladdin lies and steals, Beast has anger-management issues, Prince Charming has an over-bearing father and lacks commitment, Peter Pan refuses to grow up, Tramp hates responsibility, Robin Hood is an outlaw, etc. I'm fairly certain the only functional family we see is Pongo and Perdita in 101 Dalmatians.

The point of Disney romance is that we rescue each other from our own faults and situations. We help each other get out of our own way, or out of the tragic situations we've found ourselves in. Aladdin has to learn to stop lying and see the value in himself. Tarzan helps Jane out of her own societal issues, she teaches him about modern society and companionship. Flynn breaks the cycle of Rapunzel being used for her hair, she loves him for who he is. Cinderella is sweet enough to win the heart of a Prince. Eric finds a woman as wild and joyous as the sea he loves. Hercules is faithful to Meg, and she sees through the muscle to the heart of the man.

Since I am not married, nor have I ever been, maybe you're sitting there thinking my post is idealistic poppycock, but I have actually been in relationships where guys saw through my bulls*** and I saw through theirs and we helped each other grow.

So they didn't end up being "the" guy, but that doesn't mean the entire philosophy is crap. I don't necessarily need someone to save me from my life, but I want someone who'd try, and I'd try to save him from himself... cause God-knows he'll need it. Disney men aren't perfect, and neither are the women--they just reach a point where they decide that love is better than their hang ups, and they make a change for each other, for themselves, for the sake of love. What's so stupid about that?


2 comments:

  1. I love this. I think that's all I need to say. thanks :>)

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  2. Hey girl! I really loved reading this, and actually replied on my tumblr here: http://madeofair.tumblr.com/post/9502647884/disney-is-ruining-my-life-continued Thanks for reading my article on HelloGiggles! <3

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