My Grandmother's China

Probably 10 years ago, my grandmother gave my mother 3 incomplete sets of beautiful china. 2 sets were a light bluish green with delicately designed flowers and vines painted on and rimmed with silver.

One was a pink and gold rose pattern. It was pretty and shiny and less scratched.

The blue china was chipped in places and scratched. Plates and cups are missing from both sets...

They are a mess.

But I completely adore them.

This summer my parents made it clear that they didn't really want the china. It's been residing in the bottom of a cabinet and making appearances at Thanksgiving and Christmas... but as more members of our family are procreating, the holidays are becoming affairs for plastic rather than antique china.

They were painting and needed to move the cabinet and they wanted to throw away the china or donate it... and something in me rose up and protested.

Over 2 weeks this summer I lovingly boxed up the 2 mixed sets. Every gravy bowl, every platter, every plate, desert plate, tea cup, and saucer... I want them. Four boxes and countless yards of cardboard and bubblewrap later, my china is safe and sound and waiting for me.

You see, I live thousands of miles away in a little rented houseshare and have no need of china for the foreseeable future. The china would never survive the shipping process... but even so, I'm not living a blue and silver china life... even if it is scratched.

When driving to Philly International New Year's Day my parents prayed with me in the car. My mom prayed that God will bring me my partner soon so we can love each other and have a beautiful family.

I almost feel like my family is packed up in those boxes with the china. A part of me, the domestic part, the maternal part, has been bubblewrapped and carefully placed in boxes so it can't be damaged. She's been labelled "fragile" and placed in a cool, dry place till I come back for her.

And I have no idea when that will be.

But when I do know, I know where I need to go to get the beautiful, blue and silver, hand-painted and scratched china--a muck luck of beauty with a few bit missing that is me.