Dying to Live: Service

We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be made visible in our bodies. For while we live, we are always being given up to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus may be made visible in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you. ~2 Corinthians 4: 8-12

All around the world in so many different cultures, there are myths and legends and folk tales and stories of immortal beings, or creatures who gain everlasting life, or people who are reborn, or go into another life--a heaven, a hell. Some of those stories even feature stories like Jesus--the dying God--the God who saves the world with sacrifice.

But, as far as I know, Christianity is the only religion whose central belief lies in this point. As Father Cantalamessa says "Every other religion in the world tells you what you must do to be saved. Only Christianity tells you how much Jesus has done to save you." I love this. I love the idea, the truth that Death couldn't hold Jesus in the tomb. That, as the hymn says, he "burst forth" from sheol.

Ever since I decided I wanted to really follow Jesus people have told me that being a Christian wasn't easy. Jesus wasn't going to make my life perfect. That wasn't the point. Not even in getting everything "right"... never ever sinning again. That wasn't really the point either (though it'd be pretty cool if I could manage it). No... I was always taught that following Jesus is challenging because we live in an "unredeemed world". Not everything here is in love with Jesus and I'd eventually meet some enemies, and when I did, I was meant to love them.

I've been meditating on the passage above for a few months... what does it mean that Jesus' death lives in me? And it feels like hope and grace when I think about it. It feels like Jesus' death in me is the anti-toxin for all of the selfish poison I give myself everyday... the self-centeredness, the meanness, the cynicalness I carry around in my flesh. Jesus' death covers that. It neutralizes the acrid smell of death into fresh ground where fruit can grow.

The death of Jesus cleanses me... it makes my heart ready to be good. It gets me out of my own way so I can love people better, so I can put others first, so I can find wisdom and have discernment in tricky situations.

Again, in Philippians 3: 10, Paul says:

I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the sharing of his sufferings by becoming like him in his death

It seems like, here, death is a place where Christ has solemnized this intense power. Not through his life... life was just the pre-game. It was in death that Christ's power over the grave came to fruition. And it was in the death that we get the amazing grace which covers us.

The Ascetics believed that the flesh was the deadly part of man... that we needed to be all spirit... that our bodies would waste away, just as all evil, sinful things eventually do. They wanted to control the body and did very odd things like fast for really long times and flog themselves. No. Thank. You.

While some evangelical Christians use words like "die to the flesh" to mean "become a better person" and "not let the world affect me so much" and while these things are good... I think it misses something. I think it makes it all about control more than about letting go in order to access the grace and love and patience and peace that Jesus gives us in his love for us. He has power over the grave. He has sovereign power, and he gives this to us when we disciple with him.

So... it looks like the outline is meant to be the
Bible or some book. I didn't mean for that to happen. 

I think this metaphor of grace also smacks on faith. Not only do we believe in Jesus and his power, but we also eventually have to stop being angry at ourselves and believe in what Jesus says about us.

We believe, though we do not see, we have faith in the idea that one day poverty will end. We donate to charity and spend time at food banks and work with the homeless and give our clothes to charity shops etc. etc. etc. because we want to make this idea, this intense hope, a reality.

These acts of service and love also transform us, bleed the death out of us and plant life in us:  "We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.... So death is at work in us, but life in you." 

If I really want to be perplexed, I sit down and try to figure out a way to get everyone to work together to stop world poverty... or modern day slavery... or violence... or greed. I'm not going to lie... it ruins my day. If I go at it for too long, it does just "drive me to despair."

I can understand why Paul was saying this... there are times when I'm just tired. I don't want to help anyone else. I can't organise anything else. I can't take one more phone call. I can't read one more prayer request. I can't deal with one more disgruntled person... if anyone needs anything from me, I might run out of the room screaming. There are times when I just want someone to love and serve me... But really, when I'm serving others and loving them, being patient with the rude person, making tea the very special way my homeless friend likes it, taking time to smile instead of rushing through with a blank gaze... it helps my heart. I think life is just as much at work inside me during these moments. These moments are the ones where I get to access that power... that immense but invisible power to change the world.

Tomorrow I'm helping on Alpha for the first time. I want to believe that I'm doing really important spiritual work, but really, I'm going to help set up and say hello to some people and just smile and listen to them.