The Other Boleyn Sister and other films

I've been watching a lot of different films with interesting views on relationships. The mother of Anne and Mary Boleyn comes off as a surprisingly strong woman: she was part of court growing up and married less than she. Her brother and husband are ambitious, so is Anne, according to history, while Mary is soft and tender, but very "weak". Early in the film, Mary's mother talks of her daughters being reared and then traded and sold like cattle. They are the beautiful cows of the earth.

When Anne finally manipulates King Henry into marrying her, when he gets rid of Katharine and breaks with Rome, he rapes her. Later, after the birth of Elizabeth, she's finding it harder and harder to arouse him, and they are violent and cold with each other. Their love is not the way it should be. In her fear, she asks her brother to lie with her after she miscarriages. Definitely not the way it should be.

I also watched Indecent Proposal... I absolutely hated it. "If you let something go and it comes back to you, it's yours." There is no way a husband should give up his wife to another man... even for a million dollars... even if they would die. There's no way a woman should give herself to another man "for her husband." I'm sorry, that's the worst bullshit I've ever heard.

I'm seeing a reaction in culture recently... at least in art. A few years ago extraordinarily strong women were seen as being the best. Women who could use their sexuality, their cunning, their intelligence to get what they wanted. Women like The PussyCat Dolls, women like the dancers in popular movies, women like Sarah Palin women like Anne Boleyn. Culture seems to be coming against them, and they are being found wanting.

The phenomenal hit Juno brought us the strong teenager, not extraordinarily girly, who finds her heart and her love in her best friend. Named after Roman goddess Juno, Jupiter's wife, she was jealous and powerful, and wrought much destruction. Juno the girl, however, uses her sweet heart to do the right thing, and saves a baby instead of destroying it, unlike the goddess who took pleasure in destroying the children of Jupiter's conquests.

In The Other Boleyn Sister, it is Mary, the sweet, gentle, weak one who the King trusts.

Women like Bella, in the Twilight series, someone particularly fragile in a world full of super-human monsters. Bella's strength lies in her heart and her ability to love and be selfless, not flaunt herself, like the other girls at her high school.

Even kick ass Angelina Jolie a few years ago took on a much different role in the movie Changeling, where her character has incredible intellectual strength and a mother's love, instead of the butt-kicking fighting of her usual movies.

The point is, women are strong and sexual, but the beauty and strength of women comes out most in her love, her heart, her softness (not weakness, but softness). Art and film and hopefully culture are beginning to see this. Women are not men, and what makes them strong isn't the same as what makes us strong.

Instead of trying to be the same, I hope that eventually we just try to make each other better men and women.