Getting away with it

"Despair was a private weakness she could not afford to indulge.

But when she remembered that day at Faine's farm--or those many, many other days that she'd put out a fire.... she didn't remember that she'd succeeded, She remembered that she had no idea what she was doing, and no idea why it worked. It did not feel to her, remembering, like an indication that she was learning her job, evidence that she was, after all fit to be Chalice. It felt like something she had got away with, that she might not get away with again." Chalice ~ Robin McKinley

I feel like this all the time...